


On the Brink

by Unified820



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II
Genre: Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Love Confessions, M/M, Male/Female Hawke, Muse AU, WIP, fenhawke - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-24
Updated: 2017-09-24
Packaged: 2019-01-05 02:37:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,007
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12181269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Unified820/pseuds/Unified820
Summary: Hawke has made a decision to join the Inquisition, but Fenris knows what is intended, and will stop it at all costs.Crazy idea that I could not shake; what if Hawke is a Muse? How would that frame the game, interactions, and outcomes?





	On the Brink

“I'm a muse. Everything falls into place because I am what they need me to be when they need it.” The words fell effortlessly as Hawke stood, staff in hand, bag over shoulder, ready to leave.

Lightning flashed outside with a shattering crack as more rain pelted down, beating against the ragged hut. “How do you explain the Chantry? Anders? The whole mess that is Inquisition right now?”

"It's my fault. I stopped responding to their whims. I put myself first and it fell apart.” Hawke looked down at the dirt floor, the pang of guilt ripping at Hawke's heart revealed itself in the flutter of an unsteady voice.

Fenris faltered at the confession but caught himself in disbelief. He had only just found Hawke and now Hawke was ready to run again, fueled by delusions of misplaced responsibility. “You expect me to believe that you alone had the power to change this outcome? That but for your out-of-character selfishness, none of this would have happened? No, I don't believe it.”

“You find it easier to believe that you just so happened to meet Anso? Who just happened to know about me despite my newness to the city? It was not just a little too easy to dispatch your enemies? It took time, yes, but not considerable effort.” The answer came quickly, clearly prepared for the argument.

Hawke had hidden alone with dark thoughts and the regret they harnessed, playing this conversation aloud many nights while sitting beside the small, ash-filled fireplace. “You trusted a mage so effortlessly, and found the comfort you needed, when you needed it, in my arms. You didn't think it odd that I never pushed or asked why you ran that night? Never wondered how it could be so easy to stay in my company after what should have been a terribly awkward exchange?”

“You're saying that what I feel isn't genuine,” Fenris countered. Hawke smiled in spite of the moment, always amazed with how quick Fenris could find the heart of a subject. Hawke missed their banter; Fenris's intelligent mind was alluring, even now.

“I wanted it to be, so desperately. When you confessed to me after so much time I thought that it could be real. I let myself fall into that hope. For the first time, I thought about what I wanted…” Hawke looked in Fenris's eyes, illuminated by the bright lights of the storm, needing him to understand. One last selfish need before Hawke would do what was necessary, “I can't be their muse and concurrently my own, it would seem.”

"Hawke, none of this is your fault. Please…” he begged as he reached for the mage's hand. Hawke's face was cast in silhouette by the storm, and Fenris was scared to know what those eyes would reveal.

Hawke let him take a hand but turned away to respond. “It is my fault and I cannot let it happen again. I cannot live with myself if I stand by and do nothing while so many innocent die.”

The chill of the wind blew through the door with a clatter and sent a sickening shiver through Fenris's body. “You are not planning to make it back alive.” It was not a question. He knew what was intended and it angered him. His markings flashed as he pulled his lover close. “You are going to sacrifice yourself on some idiotic notion that you are what, a silent savior?

The backpack fell to the crook of Hawke's arm in their struggle, but Fenris held tight. “Fenris I can't explain why you think you love me after all this time.” Fenris forced Hawke to look at him. “I have not actively influenced you in years, but I promise you, once I'm gone this feeling will fade. It will not be the gut-wrenching fate you expect.”

"Are you listening to yourself? Even if I believed you are a muse, then by all accounts the moment you stopped influencing me, I would begin to revert to my own thoughts and feelings, untainted, correct?” He softened his voice and quelled his markings but did not let loose his grip or Hawke's gaze.

“Yes,” Hawke responded without emotion.

Fenris took a deep breath, he would not let Hawke close off from him. “Then, again, how do you explain all of this? Everyone else reverts but me? Anders blows up the Chantry, Kirkwall descends into madness, the Inquisition even, but me? I alone stay under your spell? It's not logical and it isn't true.”

“I told you...I can't explain it.”

He knew he could break through to with just a little more. “Yes, you can.”

“No, I…” Hawke tried to fight, weak from exhaustion the fateful choice wreaked on the body.

"Hawke, you know this is real and I will not let you throw it away,” Fenris held the shaking hand and moved to the door to close it and stand in the way of flight.

"They need me,” Hawke implored as tears welled in sapphire eyes.

“I need you,” he countered softly, taking the staff and setting it against the wall.

“They will die,” Hawke's head hung in despair.

“I will die,” he lifted Hawke's head in the palms of his hands until the sea of his loved one's eyes met his.

“I can't,” Hawke cried out against him.

“You can…you can help but you don't need to sacrifice yourself to do it. Let me help you. You are not just a tool, your fate in life is not only to support others.” He brought Hawke's head to cradle on his shoulder and brushed his fingers through the silky raven hair.

“I don't know how ” Hawke bunched Fenris's shirt in fists.

“We will find a way,” he soothed as he kissed Hawke's temple. “I told you once that if there was a future to be had at your side I would gladly walk it with you.” He pulled the tear-soaked face of his future up to his again, “don't make me a liar Hawke.”

**Author's Note:**

> If you're interested in my fleshing out this WIP, let me know in the comments along with your gender preference for Hawke. If there is enough interest I'll work on it more.


End file.
